Going in public with your kids is always sort of a gamble. You never know what your going to get. Pete took all three boys to Wal-Mart the other night and this is how it went down. They walked passed the Intimates where a purple bra was displayed. Since purple is my favorite color Luke loudly says- purple for mommy! Jack chimes in -No, those are for boobs. Luke then smiles and says-Yeah, boobs. Then reaches out and begins to stroke the bra while continuing to say boobs. There was a couple in their 20s nearby who heard the whole thing and just started laughing as hard as they could.
We have a little zoo in town and there are monkeys that the boys enjoy seeing. One monkey was sleeping in such a way that he was splayed out for all the world to see. Jack looked at him and goes- Mom, why does that monkey have such a long nose? Well, there were a lot of little kids around and moms, so I wasn't sure the correct route to take. Do I come right out and say- That's his penis or do I try to do it in a more subtle fashion? I took the subtle route. Oh, Jack, well that's not his nose, he is a boy monkey. This did not solve our problem because Jack didn't understand. I really should have just said it at that point, but instead I told him to think about it. A minute or two later he starts laughing and says-I get it now and he whispers in Luke's ear and they both start laughing and saying the word penis over and over.
I took all three boys to the grocery store yesterday. Jack has lots of energy so immediately he gets Luke involved in 'playing' with him and they start running and hitting and wrestling, basically they thought we were at home. I devised a plan and told Luke he had to hold onto the cart with one hand or else he was going in the baby seat where Thomas was. I then gave Jack missions so he could still run around but do so in a more helpful way. I would ask him to find various foods and compare the prices so we could know which things were on sale. We kept passing a middle aged couple who thought we were hilarious. At one point Jack disappeared while on a mission. I told Luke we had better go find Jack. The man and woman happened to pass by and with a smile on his face the man quietly says- oh, he is over by the fireworks. Jack was actually very still and calm, he takes his fireworks quite seriously. As we were ending our trip we saw a dad with his 5 pre-teen and teenage kids and I wondered which of us would have a harder time at the store.
Finally, last night I took Luke and Thomas to the Goodwill. I initially had Thomas in a cart to contain the madness I was sure would ensue if they were both out running around. However, they see the toy section so I have to let Thomas out to look. In hindsight I brought it all on myself, I mean I am the mom whether they like it or not so this gives me certain powers. Thomas found this push toy and was so happy and smiling and would actually follow me wherever I was going so I let him stay out of the cart and push the toy. Of course, he managed to slide in between some racks that I couldn't get through and when I turned down another aisle to meet him he was long gone. Thinking that I would just be able to grab him quickly I left Luke by the cart and told him to just stay there for one second and I would be right back. Yes, I should have put Luke in the cart and we should have gone to look for Thomas together-duh, I know that now. At the time it didn't seem like the easiest solution.I couldn't find Thomas right away so I went back to get Luke, now Luke was gone but I could hear him. He was running through the store yelling-Towie, Towie, come here! Sigh. I decided to grab Thomas first and I found him just leaving the toys. I put his push toy in the back and put him in he cart. I can still hear Luke and I know we are right next to each other but somehow he eludes me. Finally, he stops yelling. It is silent. I glance around and a lady looks at me and points to where he is. Really, that was my fault but still......
Taking kids out in public is a chancy thing to do. You never know what will happen.
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