how we are and our family pictures

So this summer has been a little different than the summer we envisioned for ourselves a few months ago. People have worried about us and asked how we are--thank you enough for caring it is very sweet. We are doing fine. We move back to Indiana in a week and are very excited. We have made many great memories staying with Granny and Pappy this summer, and I am sure this special time with grandparents will benefit the boys greatly. Still, it will be nice to finally feel like we are completely settled back into our lives. We had pictures taken of us this summer by Sarah Ward who did an awesome job and was very patient with the boys-- and let's be serious-- with the adults as well.

So here is a tiny bit about how everyone is doing and then enjoy our family pictures.

Thomas- he is almost 1 now and I can't believe it. He loves to sing and talk (sometimes he actually says words like hi, bye, and ball). When he smiles he scrunches up his nose and it is the cutest thing ever. He can pull up and cruise but doesn't seem very interested in moving away from furniture just yet. This summer he has loved balls and swimming in the pool.

Luke- has made huge advancements in his language skills and it is so awesome to hear him begin to talk. When we left he only said one or two words--sometimes--and he was 2. Once in Germany he began to say 3 or 4 words in German. When we came back he continued to use his German words but very little else. Then about a month ago he just had an explosion in language. I am not sure if it is because he has had so many aunts and cousins around who have helped him or if he just decided it was time to start, but the difference from the beginning of summer to now is amazing. He has loved having the aunts and cousins around because they would carry and play with him like he was their little pet. He likes having little baby things (small tiny things) to carry around and be his pets-like toys, balls, or balloons. He took swim lessons this summer for one week and loved that he got to be a big boy and do something Thomas couldn't.

Jack- has taken to the water like a fish this summer. At the beginning of the summer he was nervous of the water and unsure about what to do while in it, but now he has no fear. He jumps in , does cannonballs, can doggy paddle the length of Granny's pool, has jumped off the diving board multiple times, puts his head completely underwater,is starting to learn the frog kick, and wants to be in the water every day. It has been so fun to see this transformation and emergence of confidence. He went to VBS even though he didn't know anyone in it and it was at a church he was not familiar with-I was so proud of him for doing something that I know was outside his comfort zone.

Pete and I are doing fine too-- there isn't much to report on us so you will just have to take my word for it.

Ok let the family pictures begin----

here we were going for all the boys laying on their stomach but it didn't work out

didn't work here either

basically this is when we gave up on that idea

injury, running, and an anniversary

Thomas was sitting in his booster seat, I was making eggs, and the other kids were just wandering around the house waiting for breakfast. Suddenly, I hear a crash and a sobbing, painful, frantic cry. Thomas was still in his booster seat but now the booster seat was on the floor and Thomas's face had attempted to break the fall. Luke was just standing there staring. Luke had pulled the booster seat off the chair, but didn't quite understand that this is what was causing all crying. I picked up Thomas to find that his mouth and nose were bleeding. I couldn't take it- I went to wake up Pete until the bleeding stopped. It was determined that Thomas broke his nose but since babies mostly have cartilage in their nose and it had broken straight there wasn't much we could do other than give him Tylenol and make sure he didn't hurt it further. Oh my. This after Jack jumped backwards into the pool causing him to smash his mouth on the ladder causing his tooth to go straight through his lower lip. I think I am going to have to get used to injury since I have such active boys.

after his fall and after the crying stopped

Jack has decided that he is going to be our running man. He decided that while his Granny and uncles were running in a 10k he would run in a 1 mile race. So on the 4th of July Jack and I ran in our race, probably the first of many for Jack. It was very hot already that morning and Jack wasn't real sure about running without seeing the finish line, but ultimately we finished. We started out running but then switched to a goal oriented run walk method: run until the stop sign, walk until the big tree at the end of the street, and finish up the last bit running hard.

before our race

during our race

after the race

Also, Pete and I celebrated our 7th anniversary this month. We went to the French Lick/West Baden Resort. It was very nice and relaxing. We spent one night away with no kids and enjoyed a Sprudel Bath at the spa, sitting poolside while having drinks brought to us, a nice dinner, an hour gambling in the casino, and finally a room service breakfast we enjoyed while watching Wimbledon.

inside hotel

outside hotel

Summer Summer Summer!

These are some of the words and things that have been part of our summer so far: Family, swimming, hot, playing, Jack's busted mouth, fireworks, Squeezie being a pet, throwing and skipping rocks, girl cousins, trampoline fun, trail walks,and crazy times.

Goodbye Germany

When we left Roxel we didn't have a lot of stuff, but we had some stuff, and it had to be removed from the apartment. Not sure what to do,the secretaries suggested we just leave it on the street. This is just what we did, and it turns out that many other people in town saw us doing it and thought it was a wonderful idea. When we first started doing it a man asked if it was pick up day. In Roxel there is a day every 6 weeks or so where you can leave anything you don't want on the street and the town picks it up. We weren't sure when pick up day was, but we knew we couldn't leave our stuff in the apartment and things like a bed wouldn't fit in a dumpster-- so to the street it was. By the time we had made a few trips we noticed that our entire street was getting in the mood and so was our whole apartment building. We left before we found out when pick up day was, but we did start a trend.

Our plan trip home was a bit more difficult--dealing with children wise-- but we made it. The long trip was long but ok. Once in America one of our legs involved taxiing the runway for an hour and Thomas screaming the whole time, while I sat wedged in between to men. Once off that flight almost every single person said something about it-not negative but still they ALL felt the need to comment. Then after 24 hours of travel we thought we were a 45 minute plane ride from being pick up by family when that flight got cancelled and we had to spend the night in a hotel, and by night I mean the 4 hours until we were booked on a new flight. Still-- we were glad to be home.

We are back in the States and spending the summer in Kentucky. When school starts in August we will be moving back to Purdue.

A decision had to be made......

And so..... after packing up our lives, saying our goodbyes, leaving our dog behind, and flying across the ocean to a new country we found that moving without a support system is quite difficult. It is hard to say when and where we realized things weren't going well, when we knew that this unsettling feeling might be more than homesickness.

 We first moved into a small apartment completely furnished and within walking or biking distance to everything, and here things were not easy, but felt doable given time. We knew this place was only our temporary home given the fact that we had not signed up in time to save it for a whole year, which many people do, we only had it for 4 weeks. We didn't want to buy more stuff to stock it when we knew we would have to move again.

 We found a place to move, got the keys, and loaded our meager belongings into a car and were driven 15 or 20 minutes to a small quaint town just outside the busy center of Muenster- it was a lovely picturesque town. Maybe it was here, or maybe not, that things began to feel overwhelming. The place was completely unfurnished, we knew this going in, but once we moved in with only mattresses and a couple lawn chairs to our name, the unfurnished aspect hit home hard. There were no mirrors, and this may seem minor but how is a girl to get dressed without a mirror? There were no light fixtures and while we had been given a few odd looking ones, no one thought to help us install them and we had no clue. We asked how to do it and were given verbal instructions, while correct, did not take into account the fact we are not handy; we went without lights, minus two baby sized mini-lamps we bought. We had no window coverings and so the extreme daylight, being up north, played with our children's senses and screwed up any semblance of routine, I also once caught sight of the man in the next building's butt. We were also in dire need of a kitchen and when we asked for help we were given two websites to look at, one was ebay and the other was a combination craig's list plus the classifieds. We didn't know what to look for, how to ask, how to install it, how to transport it, and etc., finally we found a person who would accompany Pete to see about a kitchen but wouldn't be able to help do anything else. It was quite frustrating. We asked many people to help us rent a truck and transport and install the kitchen but most said they had bad backs. Argh!!!!! We needed furniture and seeing what a pain the kitchen ordeal was I simply ordered it from IKEA- it was going to take at least 6 weeks for it to arrive-also, you had to pay in cash and the time of delivery which seemed quite odd.

 I ordered a few things, like a mirror and small toy box online through Amazon, and while I received my items, I got the distinct impression that people in Germany do not order stuff online the same way we do in America. First of all, I was quite embarrassed since I wasn't sure how to buzz the delivery guy in because when I tried to speak to him he didn't answer, so I simply went downstairs. He had 3 boxes for me but didn't appear to make any movement in any effort to help me upstairs with them, so I asked him to help, which seemed to put him off slightly but he did it. The next day or so I got another box or two and it was the same man and he met me halfway this time and made some facial expression or comment indicating that I sure was having many boxes delivered-this was done in such a way that I understood he was getting tired of delivering things to me. I was able to buy things online because we had smartphones not because we had the internet. We called about that but it turns out they mail you stuff and it takes quite awhile and they don't come to your residence because they aren't even located in Muenster. Then in order to feel like I had some control I decided to just do laundry. Well no, it turns out I wasn't going to just do laundry. They had changed the lock or were in the process of changing the locks to the laundry room so either way we had no access to the washer. Let me say that with three small kids this is not welcoming news. We had a drying rack so Pete decided to set that up on the patio and fill the tub up with hot water and wash our clothes. It wasn't the best way and we obviously didn't do it correctly because our clothes dried hard and crinkly, but at least we had 'cleaned' them.

 Pete wasn't having any time to study because taking care of all these unexpected kinks were consuming his 'free' time. His adviser was out of town every weekend and holiday to visit family so he wasn't even able to meet with him, which was the reason we came to Germany in the first place. I guess, to be fair, he met with him once for math related purposes. The secretaries, who had been our main link to the German world, informed us that we would likely not make any friends while we were in Germany because Northern Germans do not befriend outsiders easily. It isn't in their nature at all. Many never leave the small towns where they were born and see no reason to do so. In fact, we learned, that if you are American and have German heritage you more than likely have Southern German blood running in your veins because they are the ones who move around- Northern Germans do not. We were told it takes years before you are seen as someone they trust enough to befriend and even then you will still be an outsider. None of this was welcoming news, all of it was hard, and no one seemed to want to support us or help us because there seemed to be a feeling of-- if you are going to live here you better figure it out on your own. While that may be something we would need to be told later on, the fact that no one would even help us set up our home so that we could at least have one place that was safe, comforting, and refuge for us was too much for me, I began to bend and break under the stress. Our family began to look nothing like it did in the States, Pete wasn't studying, it didn't seem like he would be able to study or see his adviser for quite awhile, and so a decision had to be made.

 Before we spent any more time or money did we even need to be there, should we stay? If Pete needs to finish his thesis in the next year( maybe year and a half) is it worth spending 6 months getting acclimated? How much would we end up relying on him since he was already picking up the language and I could barely order a brotchen? If I made him make all the appts., talk to all the teachers, and make all the phone calls would he be able to study enough? Would the added stress do us in? Still, we had made this decision, we had prayed, we knew it wouldn't be easy, and how would we feel just giving up? After much talking, many tears, and stressful nights of being torn in both directions we made the choice to come home. Once we decided it happened quite quickly. Pete should be able to fly out to Germany a few times and with skype and email it will get done, it may be difficult but now we see that it won't be near as difficult as if we had stayed. 

Beauty in Peculiar Places

In Germany we seemed to find beauty and artistry in some unusual places. The first place I noticed it was in doors. As we walked about town I noticed the doors, in a drab or ordinary looking building the door would pop out, it might be ornate, funny, bejeweled, loud, or overwrought. It seemed as if the owner, maybe even the building itself, was saying, 'I may be simple but look there is a part of me that shines, there is a quirky or showy side to me and here it is.' I too late began to carry my camera around to take pictures of these doors and missed so many that made me stop and smile.

If it wasn't their door then the windows almost always had something hanging for display. I can't see many Americans doing this, but there were often hearts, streamers, stars, or lace doilies.

This brings us to balconies and patio areas. Germans love to be outside and will spend as much time as possible outside, eating, drinking, cooking, socializing, or just having a beer at the end of the day, so no matter the size of their balcony it was always decked out with grill, table, chairs, perhaps lights, always flowers, and usually some type of covering to shield their goings-on from private eyes; I often saw bamboo coverings. The amount of flowers is what first drew my eye to the every day use of apartment balconies. It seems as though Germans have mastered the art of hanging flower beds and mini-gardens, to see a balcony without flowers either draped over the outside or inside of the balcony railing was a rarity.

Nature seemed to weave atypical beauty too.

Though, the place I least expected to find artistry was in the ice cream shops, and there it ran abundant.

The most prominent type of ice cream is called spaghetti eis and it looks like this.

I wasn't sure how to describe it so I went to wikipedia and this is what it said:
In the dish, an often light or white colored ice cream is extruded through a modified Spätzle press or potato ricer, giving it the appearance of spaghetti. It is then placed over whipped cream and topped with strawberry sauce (to simulate tomato sauce) and either coconut flakes, gratedalmonds, or white chocolate shavings to represent the parmesan cheese. Although it is not well known outside Europe, it can be found at some gelaterias and specialty ice cream parlors, at special events and at some hotels and restaurants around the world.


What a great chance for me to see beauty in the most peculiar places, it was wonderful.

Mass and Remembering

In Roxel the church, St. Pantaleon, is truly in the center of town with everything radiating out from St. Pantaleon Strasse. It is a beautiful church built in the 12th century, the above are a few pictures of the church. Mass is only in German with no English language option; we decided to attend what we thought to be family mass. We walked to church with the loud clang of bells beckoning everyone in town to attend. We sit in the back, at first just taking in the beauty and wonderment of being a in church built, and with foundations dating back, long before America was discovered. Eventually, I begin to look around at the people and discover that for a family mass there are no children or families in church. I begin to see that everyone appears to be around 50 years of age or older. Of course, our children begin to act out and express themselves as though filled with the Holy Spirit, and when in a church filled with other kids and families, it doesn't seem to echo so loudly and if heads turn to stare you can perhaps pretend they are staring at the kid in the next pew and not yours. When your kids are the only kids in church and the old people give you looks, it feels different, wrong, like you what were you thinking bringing children to this place. Pete takes the offending child to the back while I pull out books, stickers, coloring crayons for the ones left with me, and even this distraction seems to make more noise than our neighboring parishioners want. Soon Communion is upon us, just as we are to go up and receive it, the doors to the back open and families begin to trickle in. They are loud, talkative, carrying little bits of paper and craft projects, the parents stand in the back chatting, and these child-parent combos receive no looks of ostracism. To the best of my knowledge Family Mass must mean that the families get to go to a parish hall to color and learn about the gospel through crafts, while the adults enjoy the quietness of a solemn Mass.

After Mass Pete showed me the small crosses in the back with names and dates, these are the names of people who died during WWII. For such a small town  it was sad to see a whole wall filled with the names of men who never came back to their families. It was also in that moment of sadness I realized when studying and teaching others about WWII it is easy to see the Germans, as a cruel people who began or played a large role in beginning both of our World Wars. This is far too simplified and uncomplicated, and it should be remembered that no matter what- in war men with families kill other men with families and it brings sadness and heartache to all involved.

There is a monument to the both wars that basically says-We Remember for the World. Being a history fan I wanted to learn much about Germans, WWII views, and so much more, but when the subject of war, the country bring divided, or despot rulers came up the subject was quickly changed. Perhaps this was because we were Americans, but it seemed as though the topic received a quick yes, no, and then on to the next subject please. Germans are not an open people with strangers, basically it is a Southern family feeling of what happens in the family stays in the family and we will not talk about it. However, with Germany you cannot hide things like different crosswalk signals for East and West Germany, dishware with a made in West German stamp, the poverty that still lingers in East Germany compared to West Germany, and the fact that even now they do not issue phone numbers that contain the letter combinations which would spell Nazi. Still they remember and they know how the world was affected but instead of dwelling on it, let's just move forward, seems to be the mentality.