Friday, December 3, 2010

Exploding Baby Jesus

I wasn't really planning on writing anytime super soon. I mean , I just wrote on here the other day. I thought of posting a few things to my facebook status, but well, then my status would be really long, and I always wonder why people make such super long status updates, so that idea went out the window. So it boiled down to why not just do a quick little blog about it.

So the following are things that happened today.

-This one is just quick and cute. Luke thieved my pretzel today. Jack and I bought a pretzel at the mall, to share, and I guess Luke took that to mean thieve from his mom and brother. When we sat down to eat the pretzel a big bite was gone. Where did it go? Surely they don't sell pre-eaten pretzels. Then I saw it-- baby Luke's mouth was bursting with pretzel. Listen baby Luke-in the words of Dora the Explorer, "Swiper, no swiping!"

-Last year Jack received a Little People's Nativity set. We put it up in his room this year. It is cute and kids can play with it-- which is sort of a catch isn't it? I mean, yes, it is kid friendly so it can't get broken. A plus for sure. This year I had to super glue the shepard's head back on (from my nativity set), and no kids were involved in his beheading. So plastic = great idea. However, the thing is, they can play with it. Do you want your kids playing with the manager scene? Now really? I am not talking about those rare children that will act out the whole Christmas story, but kids who will take the pieces and actually play with them the way kids play. Let that sink in. Ponder it even. Ok. Now my son explodes things, not for real--yet, he explodes me, the cashier, Tigran, Luke, his friends, and etc.; I hope you are getting the point. Today Baby Jesus and either a dinosaur or a transformer were exploding people and things all over the house. Toys were being thrown across the room, into the tree, at the ceiling, bad guys and good guys alike were being killed- all at the hand of baby Jesus.

-We were invited to a Christmas party at our friend's church. Now many people who read this may have been at said party and may not have noticed these things, and to you I say--- Great! However, the following events are real and did take place. During dinner Jack was told he had to eat 10 bites or else we would not stay to see Santa. I give him 10 of the smallest bites of cheese and noodles(things that he loves) at bite number 10 he opens his mouth, make a face and noise like he is going to vomit and then begins to cough up and out the food in his mouth. Yes, people saw this-it was gross. I had a napkin handy so I was able to at least put it over his mouth. We decide to let him play. There is a portable coat rack thing in the gym, boys are climbing all over it, and Jack starts moving all the boys across the gym while they are dangling from coat rack. No, that isn't so bad-- a boys will be boys thing-- still it was my boy. Next it is time for the reading of the Christmas Story from Luke with a few carols thrown in. Jack is in the back with a few other kids running around. I figure it is better if he stay back there then forcing him to sit with us and listen because that wouldn't have happened. He gets a large broom and begins to chase kids with it while roaring at them. He is a loud roarer, so if you were in attendance at said program and heard growls, that was my kid. Then my friend gestures to where my son is, and he has managed to take the plastic part off the fire alarm and is about to reach up and finish the job. Now really, that may have been fun--right? Finally, while people are still reading and singing, he begins to turn off the lights in the gym. We left after that. Santa was coming so we had to get out of there before he saw how bad we were. I think we just missed him, so he probably has no clue what happened.